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September
12:03 am / 14.09.03

september is dead again
fireflies have lost all light
and all the spring jumpers have fallen
so insets misunderstanding
in comes confussion
and kisses are wishes on stars
wind through empty car windows
moon yellow and
sliced the tip off.
my feet carry me through the same pain again
so i stop to feel tonight.
feel heat in my chest.
and paint rolling over my fingertips
and the heavy lead in my toes
from the loss of
the blues i once painted into your smile and
all the colors I named Raspberry
told you I loved you through breeze in our hair.
now I wander driving
nights are for driving
watter sits heavy at the back of my throat
i smile
cough and choke a little
spit a little
cry a little.
September is so undecided.
no plans no ideas
all shot down until
we paint our pains
and I try to catch myself in
blue.
white and brown
pill box hat
and starlight
moonlight

i swallowed by sighs tonight
just think.
tomorrow is not another day
we're just turning the lights back on
to show again how dull september is.
How insane the future is.

september isnt white
he's dirty and uncut fingernails
scratch all his curses into my arms
up and down my back tatooed
the anthem of our chance of love
never sung never heard
the chances of us being us
slim to none. slim, no. none.

Out of september--throw me far away
I will be your white
american beauty you wish for
some time I will prove my worth
somehow I will teach the sun
and moon and I will not
die in the fall.
I will blossom and I will grow
I will not die in September.

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