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shallow home
12:05 am / 16.11.03

this house is like a grave dug too deep
tonight i can hear mom crying
into her pillow.
and she sleeps too far away from daddy
there is no love her
only dirty souls
all too ashamed ourselves to
let ourselves feel

Mommy says she loves me
but she hates the way i am
when Im alone with little boys
Daddy says he cares
but he cares more about how much money
i spend
and brother hates my being
thinks I ruined all my chances
early on.
and sister isnt home now
shes too far to see
too far away to love me.

Im starving to just sit and be unnoticed
I dont want attention from anyone
tonight
just want to sit here and itch this skin away
pink and raw i want to be new
I dont ever want to speak to you again
I want to be unnoticed.

let my window be my artwork
and you can climb in when you come home
climb up my hair and sing to me
off key
tell me you've never drempt of someone
plainer.
duller; whiter.

white is pure.
insanity and love
and i am a pearl
simple

but this house is not an ocean
this house is not an oyster.
this house is a grave yard full of
newly filled graves

and we're all burried shallowly
still breathing for something
we know we can never have.
say "I Love you" and "goodnight"

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