with a sunshine smile
my hair falls silently to the floor
I'm abandoning all hopes and all dreams
about who I would love and
who would love Me in return
because I've realized it is all bullshit
unless I'm more beautiful
it is all bullshit
If my reason to live is to love
why live if it isnt going to happen
everybreath i take feels like a pin is suck in my throat
and you just keep shoving it in further with every stupid word you say
and you think it's clever.
well if you havent noticed
Im sick of being the backup
sick of trying to show you how much
I Love you all.
im sick of trying to prove myself to anyone
and when i fuck up
its like im getting fucked either way
and Im being pushed down again
under the water to breathe in another breath
and to drown
Im not perfect.
I swear im not.
but everything you say
that makes me feel like i should me
pushes me further and further
closer to my cliff
now im inches away
and jumping looks like a plan.
an excape
and maybe
for one day
all their eyes
would cry for me.
like ive been crying for them
all this time
10:25 pm - Wednesday, Nov. 20, 2002
Recent entries:
Babs! - Thursday, May. 06, 2010
Golden Heads - Wednesday, Dec. 23, 2009
doublee - Saturday, Dec. 12, 2009
alone, I shine. - Thursday, Aug. 27, 2009
save me. - Sunday, Aug. 16, 2009
My profile
Archives
Notes
Diaryland
Random
RSS
others:
girlinmoon
blurrystars
ditchinmitch
windofmysoul
alwaysinhim
collaborate
jumpinheart
songofmysoul
charles-dee